I Lie Awake: Silvaze
by JunkratMasterrace
Summary: Silver is a shy, miserable hedgehog starting a new high school with nothing but a history of darkness. He doesn’t have much to look forward too, but that changes when he meets her. The lavender cat with the golden eyes. SILVAZE
1. I

**Silver's View**

Another restless night. I wish I knew what it felt like to be able to sleep **peacefully.** Alas, I probably won't ever know. For as long as I remember, I never was quite able to achieve "happiness". Like, obviously I've been happy, but I've never felt the consistent emotion of happiness and solace. like everything was gonna be just _fine_. I never was able to feel that way.

In my opinion, you aren't forced to enjoy life. It's what you make it. My circumstances don't make it quite that enjoyable. When I was about 5, my parents died, and I lived with my grandparents ever since. We were fortunate, but in my eyes, riches can't fill fortune. The rest of my family still blames me for the reason they died, I don't even know if my grandparents blame me or not. At this point I don't really care. I can't care. I'm just waiting for something good to happen,

Or nothing good at all.

I'm starting my freshman year at a new school tomorrow. Like usual, I don't care where I go to school. I don't get much out of school either. It is just more routine, more ways to put society in some sort of safe system. Maybe that's just the pessimist in me though. At least I'm getting an education. I didn't really have many friends at my old school, I kept to myself somewhat on purpose. I didn't feel like friends were, well, necessary? Dunno. I don't feel like you NEED friends. Life has been turned into a "survival for the fittest" scenario, and to my knowledge, "friends" don't fit in that setting. Cause when it comes to survival, you're either gonna turn on your friends, or end up eating them.

Or maybe that's just the horror movie love in me.

I stay up until 7:00, which is when my "day" begins. Yes, that means I did not sleep for ONE second. I'm really slowly killing myself by doing this. At least I'm aware. I said my goodbyes to my grandparents and began my walk. Luckily, our apartment was in the downtown area, and school wasn't very far. However, the rain that accompanied my surroundings was not gonna help. I tried to use my psychokinesis to shield myself from the rain as much as possible, but it definitely wasn't working.

I guess this is what I get by plunging myself into this abyss. I can't help but blame anyone but myself. Luckily I turned the corner and there was the massive, modern-styled campus, somewhat blurred by the torrential rain.

As I continued to trudge forward, I noticed a lavender cat standing nearby the entrance. She was attempting to get her umbrella to open up, and she seemed to be struggling a bit. Well, as long as other people's lives aren't miserable, that's all fine with me. Mine being miserable is something I will deal with on my OWN time.

"Uh...h-hey, d-do you need h-help," I stammered. _God damn Silver, use your fucking words_ , I thought along with mental facepalms. She turned around, her captivating golden eyes meeting my duller, amber ones. She then proceeded to shoot me the most beautiful smile I've probably ever seen. _That is quite the smile._

Yes please, I can't get to the over head because of the long line, but any help would be appreciated," she proceeded to say. I smiled and tried to get her umbrella open for her, hands trembling, ears nervously twitching. Okay, so I'm probably making myself a fool in front of her, but why do I even care? Why am I so nervous around her? It isn't even nearly like this around other people.

I frowned when I too couldn't figure it out, and noticed her upset glance at the umbrella. Suddenly I had a eureka moment. I grabbed her hand, which seemed to startle her somewhat. "Trust me on this," I said shakingly. I began to develop a telekinetic umbrella, and moved her under it, as it was only big enough for one. We went to the alternate entrance, with me gladly plodding through the rain for her to be covered. I could read her expression perfect, as she smiled over to me.

I then felt a tug at my hand as I was flung under the umbrella with her. Was she holding my hand? "I can't just let you walk in the rain like that," she said, with the most beautiful smile. Soon I found myself returning the same goofy smile. Wait, is this a smile? I don't smile? Since when- well good Lord I think this girl might have struck something in me. "T-thank you," I stuttered.

The cat smiled, and cleared her throat. "I should introduce myself, since you're a new blood. I'm Blaze," she said. What a beautiful name... a beautiful girl... WAIT! I need to pull myself together. Slow your roll Silver. "I'm S-Silver," I managed to get out. She giggled, and grinned at me. "That's a cute name," she said. Boy, was my heart racing now.

"I guess, I'm a little bit nervous," I suddenly said. Was this weird? That I already felt close with her? She tightened her grip on my hand. "Don't be. Everything's gonna be fine! Besides, you already made a friend and school hasn't even started yet," She said, with a wink. My eyes widened, did I hear her right? "I'm y-your friend?" I asked. She let out another cute giggle, her eyes burning into mine. "Of course. You're such a sweetheart, you don't need to be nervous. Just smile," she replied, literally poking holes in my heart. My goofy smile was plastered on my face as I said, "Thank you,".

Lord help me.


	2. II

_**Silver**_

So far, the one thing I can say is this is the first time I felt some form of happiness in a good minute. Was it Blaze? The school? Did the sands turn for me? Don't know, but what I do know is that I could definitely get by this happiness emotion. It feels like something otherworldly.

But it MUST be Blaze. Her smile puts butterflies in my stomach, her eyes roses on my cheeks. Is it normal to feel like this? I just met her. This surely can't be normal. But if it isn't, I don't care. There's just something about her.

"I can't wait to introduce you too my friends, Silver," she said, a smile frozen on her face. Friends? Like I said earlier, I've never had "friends". It just wasn't something I had. I didn't try to make any either, but if it made her happy, then I suppose I should.

"M-me too," I stuttered. She led me inside the building, and I caught a glimpse of it all. The school went from kindergarten up to senior year, so this wasn't exactly "new" territory for Blaze, but it was horridly new for me. All these people meeting with their friends, comparing schedules, filing lockers, getting ready to be back with their friends at school everyday.

As we walked throughout the building, Blaze was seemingly in awe of the new building she got to explore. For me, it was just something that I really could care less about. As we continued walking, we heard a voice call from behind us, a loud enthusiastic voice. "Blaze!"

Blaze turned around as did I, and were met with the approaching figure of a blue hedgehog. He was tall, fit, had emerald green eyes, and a gleaming smile. "Sonic, how are you? You've been gone all summer," she said, giving him a brief hug. "Well, you know, visiting the grandparents at Mobotropolis, who's your friend?" he asked.

I tensed up a little bit, although he seemed cool, new people are a bit iffy. "Oh, this is Silver, he's new and he helped me out in the rain," she said, looking up to me. I smiled and shrugged a bit, with Sonic sticking his hand out. "Silver huh? Nice to meet ya bud! Anyone that helps out one of my friends is a friend of mine," he said, shaking my hand. I nodded until he released my hand. "I gotta go though, Tails needs help with something, but I'll see you around! Blaze, you should bring your friend to lunch so he can meet the rest of us," he said. "Would you like too sit with us at lunch, Silver?" She asked, a cute smile plastered on her muzzle.

An invitation to sit with them? Is this some sort of invitation into their group? Will there be an initiation? Is this a trap? Too good to be true? There go my trust issues again. Sounding alarms in my head. _Silver don't do it! But Silver, do actually do it! No Silver don't!_

Asyou can see I'm a bit divided on everything.

"Um, y-yeah, of-of course!" I said, with excitement and doubtfulness laced in my voice. "Ah, don't sound so unsure Silver! You'll fit right in, no worries," Sonic replied, a smirk growing on his face. I nodded, earning a strikingly perfect smile from Blaze.

As we said our goodbyes to Sonic, Blaze and I continued onward. "He seems r-really nice," I said. "He's very sweet. One pretty popular guy too, but it's odd because he usually is off doing his own thing. We sometimes barely ever see him throughout school days, it's weird," she stated.

My first class was separate from Blaze. It all went smooth, but I still feel something strange when I'm around her. I feel happy. I feel peaceful. I feel...love. NO! That's not right.. the right wording... GOD. I really don't know what I feel, is that normal? I hope it is. It pulls me in all these weird directions. But everytime I see her...

Everything changes.


End file.
